Shawn Antonio saw a common theme in those who’ve reached the pinnacle of success, which is sadness. This prompted him to write his book, Finding Your Fire Series: Be the Beast You Are, followed by Having Amazing Relationships merely three months later. The series is about unlearning all the bad conditioning and traumas that have gotten in the way of you being you. He discusses how finding your frequency can attract others to you. He says that your fire is within you but you have to check in and see what that is for you. He also talks about why people avoid difficult conversations and the proper response to hearing the word “No”. He encourages everyone to read his book and to avail of his coaching sessions to learn more about unleashing the fire within.
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Finding Your Fire And Unleashing Your Beast With Shawn Antonio
I want to welcome Shawn Antonio to the show.
It’s been years. I’m an actual official author.
You’re authoring life daily, aren’t you?
I’m life coaching, motivational speaking, writing more books, and doing social media posts. I’m doing a lot of mentoring and helping people achieve everything they’re up to in their lives. It’s been fun and it has been crazy.
You are spreading your light. Let’s talk about the light here. We’ve got fire in here with Finding Your Fire Series: Be the Beast You Are and Having Amazing Relationships. Why did you write these books?
I saw too many people being sad in life. I come from a former nightlife. I was one of LA’s top nightlife guys that ran nightlife here, Vegas, Chicago, Dallas, and Miami for a long time for about seventeen years. I started seeing and noticing a common trend, people who had reached their precipice or the mountaintop, they were always sad and I didn’t get why. They had all the money, cars, and the lifestyle that you’re achieving and trying to get to. I notice a consistent theme of people not having happiness.
I was in the midst of this reinvention of my life in February 2017. I was with one of my best friends and I was randomly coaching his friend about going for a job interview. Out of my mouth came, “Be the beast you are.” My wife looked at me and said, “That’s the title of the book and we have to write it.” I’m like, “I’m not writing a book. There’s no way.” She’s like, “It’s going to happen.” I’m like, “What am I going to put in this book?” She goes, “Put yourself in a book.” I said all right, “That’s going to be awesome.” I’ve always been called lightning in a bottle. People always tell me I’m always this energy and if I could follow you, how do you do it? I’m like, “Be the truth that you are.” In Be the Beast You Are, I went straight for the jugular and giving you access to uncovering all the things and getting rid of all the things that get in the way of you. Unlearning all the bad conditioning and traumas and all this stuff that has gotten in the way of you being you.
I created the Fire Series because I want people to have fire in their lives and living in your own vibration, such as your unmessable. There’s nothing that can stop you from living at your height. In Be the Beast You Are is a guide. I made it small, accessible and applicable in your life so it’s not this big, gigantic daunting read. You can sit on it in an hour. Read it, apply it to your life, and change your life. It’s more of a guide. My friends and clients around the world, they actually carry it with them in their offices, briefcases and their cars. Some people even before dates, read a chapter to get in the zone.
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That book went so well. Several months later, I sat down and powered out Having Amazing Relationships. I realize that if you don’t have a relationship that rocks with yourself, nothing’s going to work. I started there in that book. I start with self and what’s going on for you and how you’re occurring, being, showing up, living, speaking, and doing. My analogy was always if they put a camera on your shoulder and watch your life for 24 hours, what would I see? Would I see somebody sucking ass, somebody swinging for the benches or being great? Who would they be? How would you be in life? I remember that analogy flowed into that book. In Having Amazing Relationships, I go deep into what it looks like in every aspect of relationships. You start with yourself, family, influences, friendships the people you call family, your romantic relationships, how are you showing up, and coworkers. I give people tools in that book to apply to their daily lives.
I love that, how you are showing up. It’s because how you enter a room will create a ripple effect. It’s about being intentional with your energy on what you want to create. Speak into that, being fire. What does it mean when you say, “I want people to be a fire,” in terms of this Fire Series?
It’s like when you’re at your best and you feel your best. You walk in a room, you’re vibrating so high, you feel great, you look great, you slept enough, you’re on top of your game. Everything is just handled, that zone and flow. Everybody has different things. Your vibe attracts your tribe and frequency. I’m the kind of person that if I walk in a room and shift vibrations, I shift the room because I walk in with this fire. If we all live in our true vibration, which is you being unapologetic and unafraid, that’s the biggest thing. No matter where you’re from in the world, I’m Spanish and Dutch, so I was raised Catholic. I was raised to be a good boy. I had to listen, obey, and pay attention. I did all that stuff then I was crazy on the other side of it because I want to be myself.
It’s about finding that balance between your truth of who you are without being unkind to people but being your true you and living at your true expression. I speak about vibration, frequency, your vibe attracts your tribe and your magnet which I shared with you. What kind of magnet are you walking around with? When you walk into a room, whether it’s a restaurant, a bar, or your high school reunion, what do you magnetize towards you? I’ve got a lot of clients that I coach worldwide. I’m like, “How do you walk into a room? What’s coming at you?”
Whatever is coming at you is the reflection of what you’re doing, saying, being, and people realize that. It’s the minutiae of how you show up is what comes at you. You can’t blame anybody but yourself. You always have to point your finger at yourself. These small effective awesome reads that are available on Amazon at $8, I made them affordable for anybody. It’s a great number and I wanted it to be approachable for everybody. It’s simple, to the point, and it gives you permission to be you.
You’re saying that everyone can have access to fire, to this energy, this vibrational energy, and creation in the world?
I was out doing meditation on personal power because I’ve been meditating for 100 days. Consistently it has been opening up new chakras and new things for me. Personal power is something that we think people can take from us but we always have it. My fire is the mellow version of me. This is a contained version because I’m focused but there’s a whole other version. Your fire is within you but you have to check in and see what that is for you. What’s your purpose? Why are you here? Why are you doing what you’re doing? Speaking into manifestation and on top of speaking is being it. People talk a lot. Everyone’s talking about this and that. Forget about talking and take the actions to be the person that you want to be and complete all the elephants in the room. I’m about to write my next book and that’s going to be the theme, dealing with all of our elephants.
People are scared to speak up. They look at that elephant, they look underneath, and they will avoid it like the plague. Why do people avoid those difficult conversations?
In my experience of coaching past years, I’ve noticed two things. One, they may have caused it and don’t want to take responsibility for it because it might be ugly and it’s something that they may have caused it and didn’t know that in their subconscious or conscious was maliciously or nuts. It’s the world of it may be my fault. Some people are too afraid to actually look at that. Number two, they don’t want to have that uncomfortable “confrontational conversation” because it might open up a door that they’re not ready to walk into.
That’s what I realized and that’s out of coaching. I’ve coached 3,783 people for many years. I’ve taken notes and I’ve always watched themes and vibrations. I’m watching what’s happening for the client and coaching. A lot of rediscovery of self and emotional trauma is getting cleansed out. The amount of cleansing for some of my clients have been crazy with many years ago trauma that’s coming up. They follow the vibration of what’s going on. It’s about surrendering. I pay attention to what’s happening out in the world and I tune into that. I always tell people to run towards your fire.
What does that mean?
It means if you’ve caused something like a breakdown, an upset or a thing. If you have a breakdown with your loved one, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your husband, your wife, your sister, your cousin, your coworker, you run towards them and say. “Excuse me.” It’s what I do all the time with my wife. This is something I do to keep our marriage on point, I say, “What did I do or say that caused that breakdown?” We’re courageous with each other, we tell each other. Were like, “You did this.” You’ve got to be courageous enough. You have to love yourself enough and love the people in your life enough to be honest that it’s not working.
That is so important. When it comes to emotional intelligence, which is all wrapped up in this, you sensed in your wife, Alicia, that there was a misalignment. Instead of ignoring it, which is a choice or she must be blowing it off, you ran towards it. What’s available on the other side, when you run towards it?
First of all, it’s your life. It’s complete freedom and your relationship that you get to create and cause. You’re listening to who you become in the world is completely shifted because you are at the source of how your relationship is. You’ve given that person permission to be themselves. You’ve given yourself permission to be yourself, you’ve also changed the dynamic of how your relationship is occurring with that person all the time. You’re also helping them grow consciously and subconsciously because you leave them in a space of going, “I should look at that.” No matter how you leave them, they’re stuck in a space of reflection. Whether it’s a deep one or a surface one, “Maybe I should look at that?” I call it being stingy or selfish. If you’re not willing to call yourself out or people in your life out, you’re being selfish and stingy because you’re cheating them from their growth. For me, one of the biggest pet peeves of humans, it’s when they cheat each other, pretending everything’s okay.
You’re not taking a stand for them.
One of my good friends, Martin Landau told me years ago. From 2003 to 2005, I was involved in an education called Landmark. He said to me, “People do this crazy thing.” I said, “What do they do?” “They do this crazy thing called, ‘You don’t call me on my stuff, I won’t call you on yours.’”
It’s like we’re hiding, the elephant.
We’re in a pretend world case. We’re like, “How are you?” “I’m good.” You could see it in their eyes. I can see the sadness in people’s eyes. There’s a friend of mine. I’m like, “How are you? What’s going on?” He knows he can’t lie to me and he said, “I’m good.” I went, “Really?” He’s like, “I’m terrible. I know you coach all the time. I know you’re off. You don’t want to coach.” I’m like, “Let’s sit down for ten minutes and talk about it.” He’s like, “This is falling apart.” I’m like, “Let’s change all the bad habits and insecurities that are running our life.” That’s what happens, our insecurities, shortcomings and our failures that happened once because we’re such silly humans. Something happens once we become so traumatized by the ones that we make it law.
Learn to love and embrace no. The no gives you a chance to shift and grow. Click To Tweet
If something happens once and you’re like “I’ll never do it again.” You did it. It was a lesson, first of all. I always say to my daughter, Viva, I say to her, “We either win or we learn.” That’s been a trending thing I’ve heard out there. Maybe it’s been going on for a long time. There’s no losing. It’s all about being present in every single lesson. If something happens once it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again. It’s not going to happen again. Not in that way because it’s a different circumstance, day and persons.
We’re never the same. When you walked into this room, you’re going to be a different person than you left.
That’s my biggest pet peeve that I’m committed to. Living in your fire for me is living your true expression every day. That’s why I meditate every day to shut that on the past noise from the day before and all the failures. I love failures because I get to grow up. I love noes. They are my favorite thing to get, I’m like, “That’s a no. What can I learn from that?” I run towards noes. I have many noes. I have many clients that have been a no years ago to me being their coach that they have been like, “Shawn, I’m ready.” I’m like, “Are you sure?” “It’s my birthday. I know we’ve been talking for a couple of years.” I’m like, “I’m ready. Let’s go.”
I want to go to that. Years ago when they said no to you, how did you respond?
I said, “Rock and roll.” I’m the kind of person that goes, “Cool.” For me, I never take it personally. It’s one of my mantras. I take zero personal. As we were talking with Paul and he was saying about no expectations. I don’t have expectations. I offered it up and said, “Are you ready to go to that next level in your life? In what area or areas?” I have hundreds of people who said no back then. I always asked why, I’m like, “Please tell me why.” Some people are courageous enough to go, “I’m not ready for it.” Some people say, “Shawn, I don’t want to look at it yet.” That’s been great.
If it was a percentage, I’d say 70% of people said, “I’m busy and all this stuff going on.” There’s a guy I’m coaching who’s a huge person in the world. He runs a massive brand and he signed up with me. He’s been traveling to Beijing, China, Hamburg, Germany, New York City and Paris, France. I’ve coached him on the phone via WhatsApp. It’s the busiest time of his life. He’s like, “Shawn, I’m ready.” We have a standing phone call. Wherever he’s at in the world, we get on the call. No excuses. A lot of people are coming back into my world. I’m gracious and appreciative and I’m like, “You’re ready.”
I love that because hearing no for me was stinging. I took it personally. The biggest lesson that I’ve learned is to be completely unattached and see everything as an invitation. I didn’t like it because it felt like rejection. It’s like, “They didn’t like me.” The biggest opportunity for my growth was being an invitation.
It takes work. What’s great about what you said is there’s a lot of work that got you from there to here. Taking nothing personal has been my mantra and I’ve been pushing on people for the past couple of months. It’s always growth on the other side. You were asking about your life. On the other side of all that no is greatness for you. Learn to love the no. Learn to embrace no. The no gives you a chance to shift and grow. I’m happy I did. To all my clients who are no years ago, I said, “The door is open when you’re ready. It’s the same number. Call me and say, ‘Shawn, I’m ready.’” That’s it. It’s been happening. It’s been great because I want you to win. One of my mantras as a life coach is I want to be as useless as possible as soon as possible. I coach people for three months at a time usually, I have people I’ve been coaching for two and a half years that want to keep me on. I coach one woman for one day. From a 58-minute phone call where she spoke for twelve of it and I spoke for 46 of it, she got off the phone and changed her entire life.
What do you say is the difference between someone who took one hour of coaching from you to someone who’s been coaching 2 to 3 years?
A lot of people have coached for 1, 2 or 3 sessions. She was at a point where she had nothing to lose. She looked at me and said, “If this person can give me access to what I want.” What was great about her and her twelve minutes is she told me everything. She was vulnerable. She went right into it. She didn’t hold back. She started off at five years old and she’s in her late 40s. She was vulnerable, open and ready that I was expecting more interaction back and forth, but she listened and took notes. She was like, “Repeat that.” I kept going because I was in a flow and a rhythm. I was channeling and getting into her vibration. She was ready.
The people that I know and I have some of my greatest friends that I love, some of best friends have traveled with them still coach. They’re stubborn. There’s a certain part of stubbornness or attachment which I’ve been studying the Law of Detachment, which you said about being attached. I’ve been studying the Law of Detachment, Deepak Chopra. I did the 21-day meditation with a big group of people. I had my own group of people. I wrapped mine. It was awesome. My wife, Alicia, did it. We’ve had hundreds of us do it. We started by clean and vibration. With the people that I’ve noticed and been coaching for years, there’s something that they’re stuck on that they hold on to. I have this one dear friend of mine and he stuck on a thing that happened when he was eight years old and he’s 34. He’s still stuck on that thing. I’ve been coaching for years. I love him but that one thing is still a defining moment in his life. He’s super successful. You look at his life and go, “He has everything.” He has money, a great job, a girlfriend and travels the world. He’s on fire, in great shape, and good looking.
The work that I have been doing with women and coaching is asking yourself these three questions. What was the violation? Is it happening now? What good came from it?
How did that go for them?
I’ve got to give props to Rev. Joe, who’s one of my spiritual mentors that channel through one of her mentors the legacy of it. The power of that is what’s the violation? Is it happening now? We read live things from the past. Whatever happened to you in your life happening in this room. For your client, is that happening?
I saw it happen, too. He brought it to me and it happened in front of me. I was like, “There it is.”
It’s funny because we’re almost relieving it. Our bodies, every seven years from a cellular standpoint or biological change. It’s a memory that keeps it alive. What good came from it? We can look at everything in life. I’m sure you heard this. Did it happen to you or did it happen for you?
It’s crazy you said that because I say this thing to people, “What happened to you and at you is for you.” Whatever the drama, trauma, that insane moment, it’s for you. It’s designed for you to have happened to you. These books came out of me reinventing my life at a time where I didn’t want to write books. I wasn’t a trained author or writer. I said, “What is it going to take to become this guy?” I sat down and got real with myself. I’m like, “I learned how to speak straight.” My first language is Spanish. My second is Dutch. My third is English. Here I am writing an English book. I had to speak properly. I speak fast so I had to slow down. I had to get clear about my vision and what I want to say. It must have been beautifully confronting to watch women. That’s why I like face to face coaching because I do most of my coaching like that and some I do on the phone. I love seeing the emotion.
I have an amazing woman who I’m coaching. She’s 28 years old and she was dealing with some childhood trauma. She came straight with that. We had a two-hour session and the first 37 minutes, she cried. It was awesome because we dealt with all those things that were holding her back. She told me from ages 5 to 12 of what happened in her life. Even for me, out of thousands that we’ve coached, I was like, “That’s a lot.” All I have to do is create the space for her to be safe, cry, and let it all out. I had to hug her and hold her. She’s one of my old school business partner’s wife. He called me up and said, “I need you. Can you possibly talk to my wife?” I’m like, “Yes. What’s up?” He’s like, “She’s ready.” I’m like, “Put her on the phone. I’ve got space. Are you ready?” She’s like, “Yes.” She came, drove an hour and change and it was perfect. She’s so amped up. She’s like, “Can I see you in about five days.” I’m like, “Let’s do that.”
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It’s the willingness to let go of the stories. I’m sure you see that since you’re coaching a lot too. It’s a willingness to let go of what it is to being multi-racial in your background and what you have gone through, grown into in being a woman and all the roadblocks that you go through. Who are you going to be in the face of your life? For me, I’m a huge fan of all of us winning. I want everybody to win. I want empty cemeteries. I want to put the funeral business out of business. Imagine if every person out there in the world lives their 100%. How would the world look?
We wouldn’t be dealing with all the problems that we have. It would be a game-changer. You said you want everyone to win, the most challenging question, opportunity or invitation I invite my clients to speak into and think into is everyone gets to win, including the violator.
Forgiveness is a huge one. Self-forgiveness. Why did I end up in that thing? As a person who’s been molested, I’ve been molested five times. I was 8, 9, 10, 11 and 12. It was in seven months by 3 women, 2 men and 4 family members. I had to forgive myself, the incident and the people. I never forget that I forgave one of the people that had violated me and she died the day after. I hadn’t talked to her in years. I was in meditation and I was all about forgiving and cleansing my soul that night. The night before she passed, I let her go and she died the next day. It was the craziest thing. We’ve got to get better at that.
It’s the only way you can be free.
I love being with fellow game-changers like yourself who are committed to having them win. We’ve studied a certain amount of psychology that we have the skills and the applications. I’ve done in my life. I’ve beta tested all the things I teach with hundreds of people so I know it works. That’s the biggest thing. I’ve been telling people this for years, “Do the work.”
There is so much available on the other side.
This is my challenge to all my clients. I’m like, “Knock out your bucket list.” You don’t have to be 65 and retired to do it.
The curious question there is, are they coming from the ego? That’s an interesting thing because bucket lists can be ego. It’s like, “I’m going to do this and this and perform.” A lot of bucket list challenges is overcompensation.
Maybe it’s because of my magnets but luckily my people are half and half. The people I’m coaching, half of them are committed to ego purchases like buying that car, house, mom’s house. Half of them are like, “I want to complete that thing, that molestation, that rape.” Obviously, jaunted by my coaching. I’m like, “Let’s talk about the real stuff on your bucket list not only buying stuff. We can all buy stuff, get wealthy and do all that stuff.” At the beginning of the day, you wake up in that beautiful house, in that Lamborghini and a beautiful wife and you’re empty. I know that because I’m coaching someone who has all that stuff and makes a bunch of money and he said to me, “I feel dead inside.” I was mind blown. I was like, “How do you feel that inside?” Because if anybody wants your life, they’d be like, “I want his life.”
It’s aspirational from the outside looking in. Comparison is the thief of joy. We compare it on the outside and we don’t know what’s going on the inside. It could be rotten on the inside. When the material gain is your goal, what’s empty?
That is the answer. Why these books came to fruition is because I kept meeting beautiful, empty people. I was in the nightlife scene in Hollywood, where I pack nightclubs five nights a week. I open up restaurants, bars, nightclubs and pool parties in Vegas. I would run places like the Wet Republic and all these different beautiful places in Vegas. I met all these amazing people that were gorgeous, money, cars, houses then nothing. I can almost pinpoint a couple of moments but definitely, in 2011, there was a moment where I met a guy who was 6’4”, Greek, with abs of steel, 40 something years old with house, cars, women, all the things you think people want. He looked at me and said, “I’m bored.” I’m like, “How are you bored?” He goes, “My mom and dad,” and he started there. It went down to his whole thing and I met his mom, dad, his uncle, and aunt. I got what was missing for him. He filled his life with stuff. It was so distressing to him to look at it. He met me and it was over. He met me and I’m like, “How about we remove all this stuff? How about we get out of this circumstance? This massive house, these cars, girls and all your bad habits? How about we do not do that for a moment and let me talk to you? Let’s meet you.”
That could be scary.
He ran. I love runners. I coach a bunch of runners. I have sprinters, runners and decathlon people. That’s all metaphorical but they’re all running. I’m like, “What are you running from? You’re here. It’s you.” I happen to see it. If you’re going to be in my life, which I have a ton of people that I’m sure they’ll see this or whenever that knows me that avoid me. They’re like, “I’m not going to hang out with Shawn.”
It’s because you are a truth-teller and you’re a fire disruptor. People don’t want to be confronted with their demons, childhood trauma or whatever. It’s pushing it down until eventually, it bubbles up because the truth always bubbles up. You know when you were a little kid and there are the beach balls that blow up. We’re in the pool and pushing it down underneath us and it always comes up. The truth always comes up.
I’m a big visual person and I love that visual. I’m totally spreading the word on that one. That’s why I feel for them because it’s going to up no matter how much you bury it, how many things you buy, and how much you pretend, it’s always going to show up for you. Until you’re willing to actually be responsible for that and what you may have caused that to put you in that position. I was a curious kid so I ended up in these sexual positions and situations. My curiosity got me in situations where I was uncomfortable but I didn’t know what to do so I stayed in it and I froze. I had a fight or flight. I’m like, “This is happening to me.” I’m grateful for all of it. It gave me such wisdom beyond my years. As traumatic as it sounds, I would put myself in the same situation all over again because the lessons that I got were invaluable.
They make you who you are.
It’s taking the positive out of it. Most people let things happen to them and they let it traumatize them and they let it make them small. For me, I take everything that’s “bad” that’s happened to me and go, “What can I learn that’s going to be awesome that can take me to the next level?” Why not? That’s me. My wife calls me an alien. She’s like, “You’re an alien. Don’t compare yourself to anybody.” I can’t help this. I want to always inspire people to be the best version of themselves and give people permission.
How has it been to share your story through your books? How does it feel?
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It’s weird. It’s confronting for me. I’m used to it. It was beautiful because I get to see people read these and I made them. I remember when I first got it, I was like, “This is it?” I looked at how thin it was. I was like, “Where’s the rest of my book?”
Some of my clients are like, “It’s only 120 pages.”
I realized the village that it created. I have 563 name acknowledgments in there. Those 563 people are what created and gave me the opportunity to be who I am and believe in me. Many people were like, “Shawn, you need to write a book.” It’s a co-creation. It was beautiful experiencing that, writing it and pushing yourself beyond where you’re comfortable. I love doing that. That’s one of my favorite things. It’s always going to be uncomfortable. I like to live uncomfortably. I never saw this coming in being an author. I didn’t ever see that title. When we get monikers, names and titles like, “When I became a dad, when I was a dancer, when I became a nightlife guy.” We all strive to get cool labels.
Instead of a Yale course, I’m like, “I’m a Yale certified life coach, Shawn Antonio.” I like all these things I’m doing. I’m like, “That’s cool.” When I finish it, I’m like, “What does that mean?” For me, I’m honored that I have a thing that’s going to live forever that people can pick up and change lives. The first month I released it, I blasted it on every social media platform possible and I got so much great feedback from people in Switzerland, my wife’s family in Australia and all my friends in Australia. All over the UK, all over Nigeria, Japan, and here in America, Canada, and Mexico, and all South America is great.
It was so cool to hear, “Chapter two about human noise changed how I live my life.” That’s the win for me. Even one person or thousands of people have read my books, it’s cool because my purpose is to change the world. I went to Egypt and I was meditating at the Oracle Temple in Siwa on 11/11/11. I was in deep meditation, which I had gotten good at that and I asked the universe, “Why am I here?” They’re like, “To change the world.” I’m like, “No. Wrong answer. Why am I here?” They kept saying the same thing over. Spirituals could come into them and I’m like, “I don’t want to do that because I know a lot of people and that’s a lot of work.” I had a nightlife company at that point in time and I had millions of people that I have impacted, “Are you telling me to change millions of people’s lives?”
When I got to the other side of that statement and realize the butterfly and ripple effect you said, the ripple effect of millions of lives that I’ve touched change so they change one person’s life. That’s the exciting part. My Polaris North Star, which I borrowed from Sam Ovens, a Kiwi badass entrepreneur, and he said, “Stay focused on your Polaris North Star.” What is your North Star? Are all your actions aligned with what you’re doing in life? Making sure that everything that you’re doing personally and professionally is all fulfilling what you’re up to in this lifetime. You don’t get distracted by all the shiny things by staying focused. My Polaris North Star is simple. It’s impacting one billion people. I have already impacted millions so I’ve got some running to do. I’m going to keep running. When it gets that billions, it can be like, “That’s cute. Let’s see some more and celebrate it,” which I am terrible at. I’m learning to celebrate. I’m going to take one day off and I’m going to celebrate, “I have one billion people.”
I’m going to have a banner with those cheesy commercials where people jump on out and throw myself a party. To be responsible because this is something I wasn’t owning before. Financially, my company is generating $100 million a month. What that looks for me is half of that goes to my family, my life, my well-being and the other half changes the world with the charities that I start. The people I get to impact. My daughter was born with clubbed feet so I started a clubbed feet charity called Viva’s Village. We were going around the world for three months at a time. We help kids who have clubbed feet.
Did she have surgery?
She had the surgery. She had an osteotomy surgery, casting and she’s had all types of stuff. She’s walking and well. She’s amazing. I remember the journey years ago going through all this stuff. Why I am aspiring and going to be wealthy that way at that number is so I can reach where I’m going. It would be cool to have a lot of money to buy dumb things that I want. Everybody wants nice clothes and fun stuff like that. Taking my family on vacation is one of my goals. One of my goals that I’m going to accomplish is taking my entire family to Bora Bora for New Year’s Eve. My side of the family, my wife’s family from Australia and all the people that I call family. We know what’s going to look like and what’s it’s going to cost so I’m focused on that number. We’ll all be going to Bora Bora for two weeks. Those are the moments that matter. After all this talk, back and forth, this beautiful energy exchange between you and I.
My focus is giving back to people such as they get permission to live their lives. Giving people that experience of no worry or concern. I envisioned my New Year’s Eve with my family from all over the world in Bora Bora and we have this dinner with 45 of us. Alicia and I get to say something. I’m not going to write anything but at that moment, picture that. Anybody that reads this, picture that moment with the 50 most important people in your life at a table in a place that you have been dying to go wherever it is. The Maldives and you’re standing there and you’re feeling and looking great. Your hair is perfect. You’re standing and you say a toast and it comes from the heart. It’s not rehearsed. You’re like, “Cheers to this moment,” and whatever comes out of your mouth, because of the reflection of the 49 other people in that room or beachfront or wherever you at, nothing but magic can happen. That’s an irreplaceable, priceless, unforgettable moment. You can’t quantify that.
I love that one knowledge that you have definitely created a fire and I want you to continue to create a fire. What message do you have for your readers?
One of my favorite mantras is to never settle. It’s tattooed on the right side of my hand, and one is trust yourself. That’s been my mantra for a long time, but I’m actually living it. What I want to say to everybody reading this is never settle for less than extraordinary. Don’t allow for complacency, laziness, excuses, stories and all the circumstances. At the Fire Series, you can click on my bio and you can find everything I’m up to. I do a weekly Zoom call. It’s amazing. You sign up and it’s $49. You get free coaching once every Monday for a month at a time. It goes on to $200 every month. What I do are different topics and different themes.
I was talking about having a life where you’re never settling for less than anything you want. You’re not doing anything out of guilt, out of obligation, out of stories, circumstance, reason, and considerations. All those things that we usually allow to dictate our lives like doubt. We’re bigger than that. I know I’m practicing this with everybody and everybody reading, please check in with yourself and look at your life and go, “Where am I allowing excuses and ordinariness to live my life for me? Where am I Pinocchio to the world being Geppetto?” Imagine your excuses stories pass on stuff as Geppetto and your Pinocchio walking around going, “I’m happy. I’m good,” but you’re not. My message is to cut the strings, never settle, and live the life that you’ve always wanted to live.
Forget about the dream of what you wanted to live? We can dream all day long but until you take the steps to actually put that into reality, it’s on you. We got to look at ourselves and say, “Why isn’t my life working in this area?” If you look at yourself and say, “It’s probably my fault,” and be okay with it. That’s the thing with the rejection. “I caused that. How do I clean that up?” I’m not talking to my mom, what did I do? It’s my fault, “Mom, I messed up. I apologize.” “Dad, I’m so sorry. I did that thing that time. It’s caused a rift.” It’s ownership. That’s huge. I love taking ownership. Any ball I’ve ever dropped in any of my friendships I run straight to it, I’m like, “I’m so sorry. I did that. That was based on some insecurity I had because I didn’t feel good enough. My parents got divorced.” I’m like, “I go through that rabbit hole.” That’s why I did that but I’m honest like that.
Continue to run to the fire. That’s what I’m talking about.
It is your fire. Run towards your fire. That’s the difference between the fire and your fire. It’s ownership.
Where can people find you?
You can find me at @TheFireSeries on my Instagram that I have. Also, I’m on Twitter, and Facebook. I’m exclusive. I have a bunch of files everywhere but I’m specific about who I allow my universe per se. I’ve been crafting it based on people who are ready to grow. I’m on LinkedIn as well. Those are the ones I promote and actually post something daily and inspirational five days a week from Monday through Friday and I engage with my people. I’m going to start touring with my books. I’ll be touring nationwide and do motivational speaking, book signing, and writing book number three. I won’t announce that name yet but I will soon.
How you show up is what comes at you. Click To Tweet
I’m going to be doing a lot of open forums, discussions, beautiful things. Once every three months, we’ve done a couple of retreats with myself, my wife Alicia. We’re taking five only handpicked couples who submit themselves. We’re taking them for a weekend of the workshop for play, adventure and all types of different stuff. The first one we’re doing is in Paso Robles and a place called the Allegretto Winery and we’re about to do that. It’s exciting.
Do you have a website for that?
If you go to TheFireSeries.com, you’ll find everything or you can go to ShawnAntonioLifeCoaching.com. You can find all my stuff and all my courses are up there. I have five courses that you can check, see and taste what I’m giving you. You can see what I’m about and what I do. I’m going to continue to run.
Shawn Antonio, thank you so much. You are amazing. I’m so excited.
What a pleasure. You’re awesome.
We met years ago.
It was June of 2019 and here we are.
We’re together. The stars and technology have aligned.
It’s all perfect.
I loved it.
Thank you for having me on the show. This is awesome.
Thanks for joining us on this episode of Authoring Life. Sign up at AliciaDunams.com for valuable tips on life, leadership and business. You can also subscribe to the show on iTunes or via RSS so you’ll never miss a show. While you’re at it, leave a review on iTunes or simply tell a friend and remember, buy my book, “I Get to”: How Using the Right Words Can Radically Transform Your Life, Relationships and Business. Tune in next time.
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